Springfield, MO— Local atheists are considering coming together for an annual gathering but are not sure to trust in what the flyers and event announcements have been propagating. If enough people believe that the event will actually take place, it could be the largest gathering of atheists in the Midwest right here in Springfield.
The second annual Skepticon at Missouri State University might be held Friday through Sunday, according to the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. “If we can pull this off, it will be a miracle. Well a strong coincidnece at best,” said a spokesperson.
Skepticon organizers are hoping for good weather, but are not positive on how to ensure it. “If the good spaghetti monster is willing and the river don’t rise we’ll have us a nice little atheistic gathering where we can denounce every religion in the world, including those Jedi freaks,” said a hopeful attendee.
According to sources close to the organization three cases of wine were to be served to attendees at an after party festival, however those cases have been turned into bottled water. “Are you serious? C’mon, that’s just further proof that a god doesn’t exist. Who would do that?,” said MSU Freshman Hal Uligate.
“Listen, the Church of the Spaghetti Monster is for real man, I once ate a plate of pasta and then it came back up from the netherworld the next day. Don’t try to tell me that’s not a regurgitation of resurrection,” said Sara Kopler, “I believe because I saw the Spaghetti Monster once. Well, I saw its face, now I’m a believer. Not a trace or doubt in my mind.”
Skepticon claims to be a free event, where you don’t have to do anything to get in. Pastafarians from the Church of the Spaghetti Monster have a lineup of speakers that range from Dan Barker to P.Z. Myers and Joe Nickell. No one is sure that they will actually appear. Event organizers hoep the one day their event can fill a huge field and celebrate their nontheism by shooting fireworks into the sky on July fourth, while all attendees trash the land they are inhabiting, tentatively titled the “I love American Spaghetti” festival.
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