7th District Hopefuls Have No Vote

Every time a vote isn't counted, it adds up

Springfield MO—The voting records for all three candidates running for the 7th congressional house seat appears to be rare or non-existent.  Each candidate has admitted for whatever reason, that they could not get out of bed and go vote on Election Day.
Democrat Scott Eckersley has only voted twice in the past eight years.  “Frankly, voting is for old people,” commented Eckersley.  “You really can’t expect a young happening now-kind of guy like myself in their 20′s and 30′s to go vote.  In eight years I was never impressed with the issues or the people that were on the ballot.  Besides those polling places smell bad and the people that work there could use a shot of Red Bull.”

Republican Billy Long had the best record of voting with 62% of the times he could vote.  “My attitude on voting is a reflection of the Tea Party and the people of southwest Missouri of being fed up.  They are tired of what people in office voted for.  You can bet your bottom dollar that when I get to Washington I will continue with the peoples fed up feelings and not vote for the things that will impact peoples lives.”

Libertarian Kevin Craig sported the poorest record having only voted three times in the last seven years.  He decided not to even vote for himself in the August 3rd primary.  “You know the only reason that I am on the ballot to begin with is that I lost a bet.  Believe me I would rather dress up like a Catholic schoolgirl and be around a bunch of drunken sailors than run for office.  I do feel, however, when I do vote I am buying into the crap that goes with voting.  I am comfortable with the people that don’t vote thinking it is crap.  If I get the “crap vote” from the people that don’t vote it would mean that the system is crap and I would be their crap leader.  That is why I am running and taking donations.”

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