New Crimes Invented at SGF Crime Lab

SGF Crime Lab creates new crimes of the future

Springfield, MO—The Missouri State Highway Patrol Crime Lab has recently revealed that it has been working on secret new crimes that could be committed in our lifetime. Some of the rumored new crimes include time traveling into the past and making contact with relatives irrevocable changing the future, gaining access to a parallel universe and disrupting the time/space continuum, and felonious real estate claims on alien planets.

Crime lab assistant Ruth Yonkers confirmed the news just yesterday by saying, “we have been coming up with a new list of crimes to commit and the list is under tight security. It is our responsibility to let the public know that these new evil acts have been invented and identified so that we know how to prevent and prosecute them in the future.”

According to a press release, “Moore’s law states the number of transistors that can be placed inexpensively on an integrated circuit has doubled approximately every two years, which means we’re increasing our technological capabilities exponentially each month. We must be able to get a step ahead of criminal activities before criminals think to commit them.”

Other futuristic crimes concocted in the crime lab include illegally cloning tyrannical leaders from the past from DNA samples (think Genghis Khan, Hitler, Caligula), maliciously programming your personal robot to perform crimes on your behalf, and identifying hate crimes against alien life forms.

Yonkers said, “people were surprised to learn that we are not just running lab tests all day. I mean we are a crime lab, so it makes sense that we should be inventing crimes.”

In case, you are on other medications then it shall be buy tadalafil uk a good idea and you must avoid it. levitra buy online Erectile dysfunction these days has become extremely dangerous for all these problems. When we lowest price for cialis have sex, the Oxytocin, the bonding hormone is released when we orgasm and we feel more attracted. 2. Taking the work on-line are often much more convenient, particularly since those that don’t have a license will require somebody take them to local courses since they cannot india cialis drive there themselves.