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Sauna-vator Installed at Hammons Tower

A business man opens his pores in between floors

Springfield, MO—Building officials confirmed that a new elevator with sauna-like properties has been installed inside one of Springfield’s most posh, luxury-office complexes, the Hammons Tower.

Office tenants are encouraged to disrobe upon entering the Sauna-vator, drape a towel around their backside and enjoy the benefits of weight loss, detoxification, negative ions and lower blood pressure on their ride to the top.

“We have a lot of stressed-out executives and they really want an office environment that pampers to their every need. To offer the Sauna-vator is not only a privilege but a right that our tenants deserve,” said building administrator,  Hal Buildett.

Normally, a sauna is located in a small room or house and is designed to offer dry or wet heat sessions. The folks at the Jordan Valley Innovation Center recognized the need for a relaxing trip to the office and coupled the idea with the relaxing experience of a sauna.

“It is a small heated room, it’s not a roman bath house or a ‘Tokyo’s sauna’, it’s a Sauna-vator. Simply take your clothes off and wrap on a towel. Our slogan is ‘Open your pores in between floors’. We’re hoping that this luxurious trend spreads from the Midwest to the Coasts by 2012,” said JVIC representative Sven Notchringer.

Finer control over the temperature experienced in the Sauna-vator can be achieved by choosing a higher level floor for those wishing a hotter experience or a lower level floor for a more moderate temperature. Stones under the elevator floor are headed according to the heat/floor level riders choose.

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  1. Allen Marsh says:

    I assume there is a sign somewhere noting that this is “A John Q. Hammons Sauna”…