The big reunion is coming up. The year was 1991 and other than the obvious 40lbs I have gained since my high school graduation, I look a lot like I did back in the day. Of course, things have changed a bit. I haven’t worn a turtle neck under a button down shirt in a while or tight-rolled my jeans. It has been some time since I cracked out the high top Reeboks, jam shorts and Ocean Pacific (OP if you are cool) shirts. I rarely listen to my Huey Lewis cassette tapes anymore. I no longer have a crush on Tiffany…still don’t know her last name either. The one thing that still remains the same though…if I found the New Kids on the Block, I would kick their asses…all of them including that really tiny kid. I may not have looked good then but man did I smell good. There was a 6 year period that I sprayed enough Polo and Obsession cologne on myself to choke a hog and yet, all these years later, I realize that this was not the key to effective courting. This chapter in our lives is typically riddled with a lot of emotions along with a lot of dry humping…it is fair to say that we really didn’t know what we were doing but were anxious to try. I am sure there is some hot shot out there that started working out a few months ago so he could make a “good showing” at the reunion…not me. The popularity contest ended years ago and I wasn’t the winner. I think the motivational moment here would be…and this is for everyone young and old…enjoy all the days of your youth because you will get fatter and most likely less attractive…on a brighter note, however, now you can use Facebook to creep around and see who is even fatter and less attractive than you to make you feel better.
Keep em’ comin’ and watch em’ go.
Mr. Mike Michaelson
Filed Under: Opinion