Archive for September, 2011
If Bigfoot Trap Works, Wonders of Wildlife Optimistic About November Completion
Springfield, MO- According to a Bass Pro spokesman, Wonders of Wildlife should be completed be in November if their numerous Big Foot traps are successful. It is no surprise that a Big Foot exhibit would be a big a huge draw to Ozarkians. Wonders of Wildlife is making exhibit the main event. “We are […]
Office NFL Jersey Day Taken Too Far
Springfield, MO – Employees at Jimmerson Accounting were deeply offended today when VP of Operations Lance Figpie came dressed as an Oakland Raiders fan. The office had declared today as “wear your team jersey day” to celebrate the opening of the NFL season. Figpie took the spirit day too far according to co-workers. ”Lance showed […]
Postal Service “Mails It In” Develops Mailbot
Springfield, MO – Frustrated by an antiquated business model and angered at the thought of financial collapse local mail carriers are simply mailing in their efforts until Congress fixes their centuries-old institution. Mailman Jonsey Harth said, “it’s about time we did something about all of this electronic mail, electronic bill payment and some hog […]
Fall Postponed To Late November
Springfield, MO- Due to numerous set backs and mistakes Autumn will be coming months later than usual. The ridiculous heat and humidity will continue until after Thanksgiving. The delay is contributed to many factors. The cooler weather was lost in the mail due to a shipping error. The order form for yellow, red, and […]
What a Corn Maze!
Verona, MO – An excited community has prepared to celebrate the coming fall season by featuring a time honored tradition of knocking down crops into a confusing shape to befuddle strollers in a maze of happiness. This year’s shape in Verona is focused around America’s famous Russian comedian, Yakov Smirnoff. “What a corn maze!” exclaimed […]
Indie Film/News/Music Channel Hits Ozarks
Springfield, MO – Former television station KSFX becomes KOZL Ozarks Local today, and will serve as the Ozarks first indie, or independent, outlet for information in our area. The new station will pride itself by showcasing local independent bands, motion pictures and will feature 24 hours of news not mandated by the “fox”, er “man”. […]
