MSU Students Vow To Hunt and Kill Kony for Spring Break

MSU students with the severed head of a warlord on Spring Break – partay!

Springfield, MO – With MSU’s Spring Break around the corner, many students are looking forward to relaxation, cutting lose, and visiting love ones. But, some students have a more productive way to spend their vacation: hunting and killing Ugandan warlords.

“I was so moved by the Kony 2012 video that I knew I had to do something,” stated Junior Hannah Webber as she packed fingernail polish, a bikini, and sniper rifle. “Sure, some of my friends are going to spend their break partying, but assassinating a monster seems like a better time.”

Hannah isn’t the only one doing her part. Many students are planning to make their way to Africa so they can make the world a better place, by murdering Joseph Kony, the students hoot and yell in excitedly  as they honk their horns and wave Springfield good-bye; their cars filled with other students, kegs, rocket launchers, C4 explosive, Red Bull, sub-machine guns, and piano wire.

“PART-AKE IN THE BLOOD BATH,” screams Joey “KIng Keg” Walters as he rides away, shooting an AK-47 in the air.

Killing Kony seems to break down all social barriers. The nerds (carrying their killer self-made robots and chemistry set created bombs) seem to be right at home with the baseball wielding jocks and hipsters armed to the teeth with ironic vintage rifles.  All know they have just one goal: stop Koney…from breathing.

“I know this is going to be an unforgettable trip,” states Amy Parkson. “I can’t wait to get on facebook and tag Kony’s burning corpse in my album titled ‘He deserves this.’ Also meeting cute boys is a plus.”

MSU Students Vow To Hunt and Kill Kony Spring Break

Springfield, MO-  With MSU's Spring Break around the corner, many students are
looking forward to relaxation, cutting lose, and visiting love ones. But, some
students have a more productive way to spend their vacation: hunting and killing
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        "I was so moved by the Kony 2012 video that I knew I had to do something," states
junior Hannah Webber as she packs fingernail polish, a bikini, and sniper rifle.
"Sure, some of my friends are going spend their break partying, but assassinating a
monster seems like a better time."
        Hannah isn't the only one doing her part. Many students are planning to make their
way to Africa so they can make the world a better place, but murdering Joseph Kony,
The students hoot and yell in excitedly  as they honk their horns and wave
Springfield good-bye; their cars filled with other students, kegs, rocket
launchers, C4 explosive, Red Bull, sub-machine guns, and piano wire. 
        "PART-AKE IN THE BLOOD BATH," screams Joey "KIng Keg" Walters as he rides away,
shooting an AK-47 in the air. 
        Killing Kony seems to break down all social barriers. The nerds (carrying their
killer self-made robots and chemistry set created bombs) seem to be right at home
with the baseball wielding jocks and hipsters armed to the teeth with ironic
vintage rifles.  All know they have just one goal: stop Koney...from breathing. 
        "I know this is going to be an unforgettable trip," states Amy Parkson. "I can't
wait to get on facebook and tag Kony's burning corpse in my album titled 'He
deserves this.' Also meeting cute boys is a plus."