AT&T Outage Allows People to Enjoy Lives

During outage, woman realizes husband shaved off dreadlocks months ago

Springfield, MO – A regional cellphone outage tied to a national U-verse problem allowed Ozarkians the opportunity to toss their mobile phone for a few hours, free from connectivity to the outside world. “I love AT&T for this outage. I finally had time to listen to my husband instead of zoning out on my phone. I hope they continue to have these unplanned outages in the future…it’s so mysterious!” said Helen Triberkie of Nixa.

Millions of people around the area were shocked by the lack of service but pleasantly surprised to find that life doesn’t have to revolve around their hand-held communications device. “Once my phone went out, I started to notice the wind blowing through the trees. I started to Google wind velocity, but I didn’t. I just remembered that trees were very flexible and could withstand strong gusts of wind. I did that myself in my own brain without digital assistance,” claimed Marcus Singleton, a senior at Drury University.
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Businessman Charles Waverlytix said he attended a weekly luncheon and hardly recognized any of the attendees. “Most of the time people are face-first into their phone or tablet and I only have top-of-head visibility with my colleagues. I wasn’t sure what to do when they started making eye contact…I was beside myself with amazement,” said Waverlytix.

AT&T also logged several complaints due to lack of productivity and inconvenience, however, the majority of customers savored the outage and clung to a little piece of life embraced.

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