Springfield Springbreakers Hospitalized For Hyperthermia

Spring Break girl exercising proper caution

Springfield, MO- Many MSU college students did not let the cold
weather deter them from their Spring Break plans, unfortunately
hyperthermia put a stop to numerous college style hijinks. A number of
college students where admitted to the hospital after being exposed to
freezing temperatures in hardly any clothing.

“It is Spring Break, which means MTV style partying by the pool, so
we filled it up and jumped in,” said Brad Douchinton of an Triple Psi
Fraternity. “I thought when people jumped in cold water and popped out
in a square of ice was only in cartoons. I was wrong.”

College students also tried such typical Spring Break activates as:
sun bathing (which led to numerous digits needed to be amputated due
to frost bite), having a wet T-Shirt contest (which led to 12 girls
need medical attention as well as having to surgical remove their
shirts), and drinking beer straight from the keg (which led to  “A Christmas Story” like situation).

“Of course we are not going to change our plans because of cold,” says
Ashli Batch. “I starved and vomited for months to fit in this bikini
and I am going to wear it.”

The cold weather did lead to some changes in usual events such as
“hooking up” was just used for warmth  and meat lockers where used for saunas.

“Man, it is toasty in here,” says Ben Connors as he sits in the meat
locker. “It is like negative 10. Someone open the door and let some
cool air in here.

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