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Group Fart Propels SGF Into the Future

Springfield, MO – The entire population of our fair city was thrust forward into time this weekend after hundreds of people trouser coughed at once while at the 33rd Sertoma Chili Cook Off at the EXPO Center. The consolidated butt honk lurched the entire city into the future by 2.5 seconds. “It was very stange…one […]

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Woman Blows Pants Off at Chili Cook-Off

Springfield, MO – Hundreds of eyewitnesses gave firsthand accounts of a woman who had flatuleted her own pants away at the 32nd Sertoma Chili Cook-Off. Spectators suggest she consumed too much chili for her own good very early in the day and all the beans caught up to her in the end. “I….I was standing […]