RSSAll Entries Tagged With: "Organized crime"

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Criminals Anxiously Await Night Out Celebrations

Springfield, MO – Thousands of local citizens will gather in public places to heighten crime prevention awareness, strengthen neighborhood spirit and police-community partnerships, and generate support for participation in local anticrime programs…while criminals ransack their unoccupied homes. “This is seriously, like the best thing to ever happen to us,” said criminal Bluto Snatchnsuck, “I’m planning […]

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Farmer’s Market Throw-Down

Springfield, MO – GSFM has thrown down the gauntlet, tripped and stabbed themselves in the grass-fed heart following a unanimous decision among a limited group of short-sighted members (about 3 people). Following a closed vote where members were not allowed to voice their opinion, GSFM dictated that anyone wanting to participate in the Farmers Market […]