All Entries Tagged With: "Valentine’s Day"
Springfield Man Excited About Wowing Wife During This Thursday’s Valentine’s Day
Springfield, MO- Grant Stephens is looking forward to treating his wife extra special this Thursday the 21rst for Valentine’s Day. The flowers are ordered, the restaurant is reserved, and the chocolates are purchased for the special day which is usually celebrated a week early. “I am so excited for this Thursday,” Grant tells FCN. “I […]
Man Celebrates Everything V, but not Valentine’s Day
Springfield, MO – Local single man Richard Dickens attempted to block out the recent love-fest holiday, commonly known as Valentine’s Day, by celebrating everything “V” that he could imagine. His day started early and ended late, and he surprised himself with resourcefulness and creativity. “I just had the most fantastic day ever. That must be […]
Fair City News Regresses in Technology
Springfield, MO—Local satire news publication Fair City News has regressed in technology going from online blog format to the printed press. The move was made 12 months ago and readers seem to have embraced the failure in tech-forward movement. “I personally thought the move to print was great, I always need a worthless rag to […]
PUBLIC CELEBRATES “REDUCED PRICE CHOCOLATE DAY”
Springfield, MO – As news spread of plentiful chocolate supplies left over from Valentines’ Day, stores have drastically reduced the price of sweets packaged in red and/or heart shaped containers beginning February 15th. Chocolates can now be found up to 50% off at most chocolate merchants around the area. Local candy store owner Julie Sweet […]
Experts Baffled as Local Single Woman Enjoys Herself on Valentine’s Day, Thank You Very Much
Springfield, MO – February 14 was just another Monday for Brenda Morton. She went to work, mingled with coworkers, hit the gym after work, then later saw a movie with friends. But as February 14 is not Just Another Day for the rest of the world, experts and acquaintances alike are concerned about Morton’s well-being. […]
Husbands Realize Valentine’s Day Was Yesterday
Springfield, MO- A collective groan was heard all over Springfield yesterday when hundreds of Ozark area husbands realized that they forgot Valentine’s day. Although the February 14th holidays falls on the same date every year (February 14th) many husbands were befuddled by the fact it was a Monday. “I knew something was up when she […]
Lazy Neighbor Activates Ever-Present Holiday Lights
Springfield, MO—Neighborhood scourge, Jimmy Holstein, lit up his omnipresent holiday lights on Tuesday, bringing to life a sting of laziness that has hung on his roof since 2005. “The first year Holstein moved in, we all thought it was very festive that he hung Christmas lights. Then New Years came and went, and then Valentine’s […]
