Pensmore Mansion Swallowed By Sinkhole


Sinkhole swallows Ozarks indestructible mansion

Highlandville, MO – The indestructible castle Pensmore, formerly known as Overwatch Manor, was afforded every protection available to architects, however, a good ol’ fashioned Missouri sink hole has provided an unseen set back to the colossal project. This week an enormous sink hole consumed Pensmore in an 800 foot collapse into the Ozark Mountains.


The 72,000-square foot work-in-progress was to be the future home of a software entrepreneur and was started nearly two years ago and with construction slated to be completed by late 2013. The energy efficient, state-of-the-art, disaster-proof mansion made of concrete was projected to be the fourth largest home in America. “It’s certainly the most expensive sink hole in America now,” said Kellen Iopsy a local neighbor in Springfield, MO.

The Ozarks, long known for a system of underground rivers and caves, proved too much for man-made technology. “Mother Nature really delt us a death blow. We considered F5 tornados, bomb blasts and termites, not sink holes,” said construction manager Beau Jonsings. “But it’s just as well. We were dealing with a number of issues with the structure. Earthworms had softened the soil on the east side encouraging collapse and the master bedroom had a leak, which once the water came into the concrete room had no place to escape. We almost lost Dirty Earl when he fell into the master ‘pool’ last week!” Jonsings confirmed that Dirty Earl can’t swim.

Projected to be bigger than white house, Pensmore now joins the ranks of Atlantis. The home owner claims that Pensmore will rise again; however, in the meantime he plans to build the world’s largest impenetrable mobile home.

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  1. yo mama says:

    haha sucks 4 you