All Entries Tagged With: "Holidays"
Bottle Rocket War in Nixa This Year!
Nixa, MO—Monday night, the Nixa Board of Alderman unanimously voted for an awesome bottle rocket war in their city. Venders are allowed to continue to sell the small sky rockets guided by the mouth of a bottle.
Usually considered a unique hazard, due to their ability to fly in many different directions other than vertically, “bottle [...]
City Dyes South Avenue Green
Springfield, MO—City officials announced they plan to dye South Avenue kelly green in observance of St. Patrick’s Day. Citing the lack of a central river bisecting the city, the government has decided to go with the next best option: a prominent downtown street.
Mayor Jim O’Neal said, “Given my last name has an ‘O’ and an [...]
New Downtown Club “Voodru” Opens
Springfield, MO—The Ozarks newest nightclub, Voodru, opened this past weekend amid the Mardi Gras bar crawl. The club is located in the Woodruff building in downtown Springfield at St. Louis Street and Jefferson Avenue.
The Woodruff Building, originally opened February 1, 1911, has seen several businesses come and go including local lawyer offices and the Missouri [...]
Groundhog Day Celebrated via Rotisserie
Springfield, MO—Thousands of Ozarkers will celebrate Groundhog Day by feasting upon the weather-predicting varmint. Chewy yet nutritious, the humble groundhog has been feeding families in the area for decades.
“Used to be we have to go out hunting for the animal, now-a-days we can find them along a side of the road or hiding under the [...]
Holy Spirit Guides Drunk Home on Christmas
Springfield, MO—Local business man George Humphrey claims the Holy Spirit guided him home after an hours long drinking binge this past Christmas. “It was a miracle that I made it the 30 miles home, I was slamming beers, ripping shots and poppin’ pills like Amy Winehouse. Fortunately, sweet Jesus took the wheel when I headed [...]
Christmas Spirit Sucks Power, Causes Traffic Congestion While Annoying Neighbors
Springfield, MO—The Christmas spirit has once again affected neighborhood congestion and increased neighbor frustration as Jimmy Kilroy plasters his home and lawn with thousands of holiday lights. Every Christmas, Kilroy spends months decorating his exterior with festive animatronics, hanging hundreds of twinkling light strands and choreographing them to holiday music.
Locals flock to Kilroy’s street to [...]
Riverside Inn’s Ghost Steals, Returns Painting
Ozark, MO—Local haunt Howard Garrison played a final prank on the owners of the Riverside Inn this week by removing belongings from the restaurant. One painting, “View From the Ava Jail” was reported stolen on Sunday, then reappeared on Wednesday.
The art was created by Garrison while he was incarcerated in the Douglas County Jail after [...]
Lazy Neighbor Activates Ever-Present Holiday Lights
Springfield, MO—Neighborhood scourge, Jimmy Holstein, lit up his omnipresent holiday lights on Tuesday, bringing to life a sting of laziness that has hung on his roof since 2005.
“The first year Holstein moved in, we all thought it was very festive that he hung Christmas lights. Then New Years came and went, and then Valentine’s Day [...]
Cashew Turkey Unveiled For Thanksgiving
Springfield, MO—This Thanksgiving several restaurants in the Ozarks will feature a new holiday treat, cashew turkey. This offering consists of a simple Chinese-American dish that combines breaded deep-fried turkey, cashews, and a thick gravy sauce. Side options include a cranberry dipping sauce or mashed potatoes.
Several leading chefs, from bygone restaurants such as Leong’s Tea House, [...]
City of Springfield Lights Tree, Makes Wish List
Springfield, MO—Saturday night the City of Springfield gathered her closest friends, circled around the ol’ Christmas tree and lit her ablaze officially welcoming in the holiday season.
Several dignitaries attended and scribbled their individual Santa Claus requests upon a scroll located at a large table. Mayor Jim O’Neal said all he wanted for Christmas was his [...]
Wonders of Wildlife Spook-quarium and Costume Shop Opens
Springfield, MO—This Fall a traveling costume shop will occupy the American National Fish and Wildlife Museum providing costumes to Halloween participants and converting part of the museum to a haunted house attraction, or “Spook-quarium”.
In order to pay down the $52 million bond used to build the facility, officials at Wonders of Wildlife Museum and Aquarium [...]
