Springfield Stocks Up

Pawned gold is a precious commodity during snowstorms

Springfield MO.-   With bad weather arriving and more on the way the citizens of Springfield do not want to be caught “out in the cold.”  Grocery stores have reported that people have been coming in and buying the basics to get them through the hard times.  “Our sales almost triple when bad weather is predicted.”, said Mike Snoozeman of Walmart.  “We have been swamped, people are buying milk, toilet paper, and frozen pizza.  You know the essentials.”

There apparently is another essential that people are buying and is going unnoticed by the media.  FCN has learned that there is also a run on gold and that every pawn shop and jewelry store in Springfield is sold out.  William Travesty of Travesty Jewelers reports that he has never seen anything like it in his 35 years of doing business.  “Normally our biggest times for sales are Christmas and Valentines day.  But with all this snow coming down people have been coming in and buying anything we had that was gold.”, he said.  “The fact is I am sold out and everyone else I know that sells gold is sold out too.  I will get new gold product in next week but customers seem to want it now and they leave here panic stricken.”

Jed Bodine of Ozark told FCN his reason for hording gold.  “Last ice storm we had, I thought I had everything to get by.  I had food, water,a generator, fuel for heat, everything you would want and enough of it to so I wouldn’t have to leave the house for 2 years.  But something was missing and that was gold.  I realized that I may have massive amounts of alcohol and granola bars but I really needed gold to get me by these hard times.  So this time I am fixed up.  I got a sack of double cheese burgers, a flashlight and a gorgeous gold necklace so bring on the snow!!”

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