Stone County Tornado Caller

Stone County's first line of storm defence is Ol' Lou and his pickup truck

Abesville, MO—Emergency management executives in Stone County will soon hire a Tornado Caller once the aging, expensive-to-maintain tornado/storm sirens are removed June 1^st.  The county says the existing sirens are too expensive to maintain and “having Ol’ Lou make the rounds in his pick ‘em up truck a hollerin’ a folks” will be much more budget friendly.

“Ol’ Lou don’t work. He drinks most of the time and drives through town three sheets to the wind yelling at people. I guess the county figures it’d be cheaper to let him loose when a tornader is round ‘stead of using the ‘nado warning sirens,” said local businessman Jergan Stevenson.

Most residents are of the town of Abesville are perfectly content not having an early warning system during the night. “Oh yeah, great. No sirens to wake me when I’m sleeping. Only Ol’ Lou in his ’76 Ford barkin’ ‘get cher rears n gear, a mighty black tornader is a comin!’’ The county will save an enormous amount of money by hiring a town tornado crier instead of forking over $15,000 per siren needing to be replaced.

Emergency management says another early warning option is to raise a system of flags in the town square indicating the storm threat level, establishing a system of smoke signals and/or positioning mirrors that shine into each home affected by a tornado warning.

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