Strippin’ Section of Sunshine Street Leads to Awkward Conversations

Smut gauntlet on Sunshine Street

Springfield, MO- Charles Cranward’s trip down Sunshine street caused many awkward situations due to the numerous strip clubs and adult novelty shops on Tuesday. When the mid-level accountant drove from Bass Pro Shops to his home in west Springfield with his two daughters, Madison (age 9) and Lizzy (age 5), he had to face a barrage of uncomfortable questions.

“All I wanted to do was show the girls the cool water fall and ducks at Bass Pro, but I had to run the smut gauntlet of Sunshine street,” said Charles.

“What’s high caliber female entertainment, Daddy?” Madison asked to her befuddled father, “Do they mean like romance movies? Or looking at ponies and eating pink cupcakes.”

Her father just shrugged off the questions and commenting on how cute the ducks were.

Other questions on the trip included: What is a center fold? Does adult video stores sell movies about doing taxes and doing dishes? Why is that blue lady standing so crazy?

The questions reached its boiling when they passed Paradise.

“Daddy, I found Paradise? That’s heaven, right? That’s where grandpa and Jesus live. Is that blonde lady Jesus’ wife?” asked Madison.

Charles then had to explain that the place was not heaven, but a place where mommies and daddies go when they need extra fun. He then quickly changed the subject to “I will buy anything you want if you win the quiet game.”

Charles plans to let his wife know about the conversation to “smooth some details out” and always drive down Battlefield road.