First Day of School Cancelled Due to Snow

It could be like this tomorrow…

Springfield, MO – Children across the Ozarks were thrilled to learn that the first day of school has been cancelled due to an imposing threat of snowy weather. Officials claim that the trend which extended the school year into late spring has resurfaced.

“We saw a weather pattern yesterday that indicated a 2% chance of terribly cold weather, so we preemptively closed school to protect damage to property and limit exposure to the elements,” said one spokesperson.

Local mother of 2 Phyllis Ogal said, “Seriously? It is already starting? These school closures are getting out of hand.” Many agree. Of the remaining school days, experts predict that 40% will be cancelled due to expected but never received bad weather.

“I just hope that I graduate by the time I’m 36,” said third grade Wilder Elementary student Libby Pawness, “so I can finish high school before my mid-life crisis kicks in.” However, most children are extremely excited that summer break will be extended one more day. “At this rate,” said Gregory Tihkom, a 5^th grader at Disney Elementary, “I think the entire week will be cancelled!” He then left to go sledding at Springfield Lake with a group of warmly dressed friends.