All Entries Tagged With: "disease"
Hep-A Yourself Buffet Opens at Red Robin
Springfield, MO – Battling a recent pr nightmare of Hepatitis A exposure to over 5,000 people in the Springfield area, Red Robin has announced plans to open a free buffet in an effort to lure patrons back into the restaurant. The Hep-A Yourself Buffet grand opening will be May 22 from 11-6, and May 23 […]
Polar Vortex Disease Blamed for Sick Days
Springfield, MO – Citing inhumane weather and uncomfortable feelings caused by decreased temperatures, hundreds of people across the Ozarks have called in sick prompting the World Health Organization to identify this new ailment as Polar Vortex Disease, or PVD. “I’ve battled PVD ever since I first heard of the polar vortex,” said Amanda Sitherton, “once […]
Children Affected After Jump Mania Outbreak
Springfield, MO—Thousands of children in the Ozarks have been diagnosed with a certain psychiatric disease known only as “Jump Mania”. Children have been seen jumping uncontrollably across the city in grocery stores, libraries and schools at random. Dr. Rufus Sondgram said, “Jump Mania varies in intensity, from mild jump to full-blown mania with psychotic features […]
