NFL Hires Sammy B. Good as Referee

Local Hobo Clown to call NFL Games

Springfield, MO – National Football League (NFL) officials have a new face to help call games – Sammy B. Good. Good was added to the officiating ranks to help add credibility to the struggling replacement refs who have yet to gain the full confidence of NFL players, coaches, fans, people who prefer ballet, aborigines, and single-cell organisms across the globe.

A spokesperson for the NFL said they hand-picked hobo clown Sammy B. Good  from the Missouri Ozarks town of  Springfield, as the area has a strong reputation for producing high quality American football official such as Larry Nemmers. “I suspected they were going to great lengths to find individuals who would represent the Shield in an appropriate manner. Never did I think that they would call on a clown to be an official but the league really needs to instill confidence in the game. Sammy B. Good is just the right person for the job,” said Harriett Jonesly who prefers knitting to watching sporting events of any kind.

Sammy B. Good released a simple statement that contained a simple “Ahhh-ahhhh-ahhhh! I’m going to sprinkle some tickle juice on the field! Ahhh-ahhhh-ahhhh!” Before accepting the job offer, Good was most famously known for hosting Sammy’s Place on KSPR from 1985 until 1990, an afternoon show that featured cartoons such as He-Man, Masters of the Universe, She-Ra, Voltron, Transformers, and G.I. Joe. Between cartoons, Sammy featured area kids as in-studio guests and entertained with a number of clown acts and skits. He famously excited the in-studio kids with screams of “Everybody go ‘yeaaaa’!” which he plans to revive after each touchdown catch he calls.