Rain Dance Flub
FairCityNews.com | Jan 06, 2011 | Comments 0
Medicine man causes birds, fish to perish due to lack of memory
BeeBe, AR. – News of the estimated 1,000 dead black birds that seemed to rain from the sky last Friday in nearby Arkansas has authorities and locals stumped as to the cause of this strange event – until now. Local medicine man of the Quapaw Ouachita Mountain Indian Reservation has came forward and confessed that he is responsible.
Now in his upper 90s, Soars-Like-A-Bird (His ironic Indian name) is the last remaining resident of the secluded reservation. It seems he accidentally combined two dances. The “Rain Dance” and the “Black Bird Migration Dance”.
Says Soars-Like-A-Bird, “I have started to forget things and have been getting confused lately. We haven’t got any rain in my area in awhile so I decided to do a little rain dance. That’s when I think I got all mixed up and added some steps for the black bird migration dance. I guess it caused mother sky to rain birds. It’s no fun getting old.”
When questioned about the recent mysterious death of thousands of fish that washed ashore on the Arkansas River last week, Soars-Like-A-Bird sheepishly admitted he may have had something to do with that as well.
“I was going fishing and thought I’d do a little fish dance to help. I think I might have mixed in the Indian death dance with that.” He did say however it made fishing easier.
Soon after his confession, tragedy struck. While showing off his rain dace abilities, a local resident, Bubba Mack, drove by in his rocking 80s firebird blaring AC/DC’s song Thunderstruck. This apparently confused Soars-Like-A-Bird’s dance moves and he was fatally struck by lightening. His last words were, “Heya heya heya heyaaAHHH!!”
Filed Under: Sports
